Hostage
by FHT3rdandCo
Summary: Sleepovers are always fun, you talk, play games... etc etc etc. But what happens when you shove a vengeful Uchiha into the mix? [SasuHina, AU, cracky goodness, R&R]


((A/N: Ack! I've hardly written anything recently! T-T Papa grounded me off the computer(is sneaking on right now) and it's _horrible_! I'm sorry guys! I have a few more chaptered stories on the way…

**Bold Encounters**(SasuHina, AU)

**Waking**(UubxPan, sequel to 'Dreaming')

**Ichiraku's**(Tenten fic)

**The Deepest Depths of Hell**(SasuHina, AU)

**The Marriage Mix-up**(SasuHina, crossover)

**Mystery**(SasuHina)

**Arranged & Confused**(SasuHina, AU)

**Curious Strangers**(SasuHina)

**Scribbles**(UubxPan)

**Spell-Bound**(SasuHina/multiple Hina pairings)

**Need/Want**(SasuHina, AU)

'**Normal' Life?**(ShikaIno… I think. AU, possible multiple Ino pairings.)

Some of those are Burbs-chan's that I'm helping her with… -sigh- but I haven't had the time to finish writing the first chappy's because… -cries- I'm _still_ grounded!

I felt bad about not posting anything so I decided to write you guys up a quick cracky one-shot… that quickly turned into a three-shot due to my impatience, I hope ya'll enjoy :)

Oh yeah! I don't own Jack! …_Jill_ on the other hand… XD))

* * *

**Hostage**

"What was that?"'

She smirked, "You heard me."

"No, I didn't. I'm deaf."

"Oh? So your oversized forehead impairs your hearing?"

Sakura growled, "Ino! Y-you fat pig!"

A vein popped on Ino's forehead, "Billboard-brow!"

A glaring contest ensued.

The whole scene would be quite amusing if Hinata wasn't sinking in her seat, panic slowly clutching her.

…well, some still found it amusing. Karin, Temari and Hanabi would be some of those. Their reasons very different though.

'_Fight all you want, little girls, just leaves Sasuke for the taking._' Karin smirked condescendingly at them; it paid to be a closet Sasu-fangirl… no one thought you were a 'threat'.

'_Man, those two are dumb…_' Hanabi leaned back in her chair, enjoying the show those two provided.

'_If this keeps up it might get bloody..._' Temari smirked; she always loved a good cat-fight.

Tenten had other ideas though.

"Alright! Break it up!" She glared at the both of them, "You're scaring Hinata!"

Sakura and Ino blinked and remembered something very important…

…the poor Hyuuga was sitting in-between them.

Sakura laughed nervously, "Ah, gomen Hinata…"

Ino nodded, "Yeah, sorry…"

Hinata let out a small squeak and nodded, simply happy that the air had stopped sizzling above her.

Kin rolled her eyes at the vague response, none-to-pleased herself to see the cat fight go down. She had planned to throw baby carrots at the girls while they were distracted…

…now what was she going to do with the baby carrots?

Her eyes slowly shifted towards the oblivious girl sitting on the floor next to her, happily conversing with Hanabi(who was merely glaring in return) and munching on a cherry tomato…

…yes, Moegi would make an _excellent_ target.

The door opened and all the girls turned to see who it was(Kin taking mental note to hide the carrots).

"What the hell are you doing in my house?!"

They all stared blankly at the tall male in the doorway, finally, Moegi piped up, "Having a sleep-over." Her tone almost elicited a 'duh' at the end, but she kept it blunt.

His eye twitched, "I noticed… but why are you _here_?!"

It was Karin who answered while smirking this time, "Because here is where we agreed upon."

The incredulous look on his face was priceless, sadly it only lasted a few seconds before rage controlled his face again, "Get. _Out_!"

Ino giggled, "But Tayuya isn't here yet!"

This didn't seem to help the Uchiha's mood. "There is _no way_ that crazy bitch is getting in my house!"

Kin, who had been about to use her mighty baby-carrot assault on Sasuke, gulped slightly with wide eyes, only seconds prior to Sasuke's roaring statement she had caught sight of a very bright red… and it wasn't Karin's.

'_Sasuke-baka's a dead man._'

The other girls stared in a sort of horror as well; an evil aura had come up behind Sasuke.

Sasuke really hadn't deciphered what their looks of pity and terror were for until a voice asked scathingly from behind him, "_Who's_ a 'crazy bitch'?"

For characters such as Ino, Karin and Sakura, it was horrifying to watch Sasuke-kun get almost killed(but hell if they were getting in Tayuya's way), for others, more the sadists, like Hanabi, Temari and Kin it was near amusing, and for the innocent minded, like Hinata and Moegi… they just sort of stared dumbstruck.

Tenten flinched a little at a particularly painful looking move Tayuya pulled before turning to the audience, "Anyone up for tea?"

Hana, who had remained silent previous to this point in time, smiled and nodded, "That sounds great."

---

Hinata munched on a cinnamon roll, it had been roughly an hour since Tayuya had, very literally, kicked Sasuke out of his own house and the sleep-over had gone fairly well since then. She wondered why Kin kept giving a bag of baby carrots a smirk though…

She did feel bad for what they did to Sasuke, but only on a minimal level. She felt as much remorse for it as she would a total stranger, not because she didn't know Sasuke well but because she _really_ disliked the boy.

Also, the girls had been formally invited by Itachi, it wasn't _their_ fault Itachi neglected to inform Sasuke of this.

She laughed a little at something Temari said, the current topic of conversation was somewhere in range of funny/ironic stories. Hinata wasn't putting her entire concentration into it, after all, she had a _cinnamon roll_… she smiled, happy to be in possession of the sweet pastry.

Ah… it was like it was just her, the pastry and… that suspicious figure outside the window?

Hinata blinked, someone was outside the window…

…but… but… her pastry! She couldn't investigate _now_! Sh-she wanted her cinnamon roll!

_Two_ figures outside the window…

Sighing, she excused herself to the bathroom so she could investigate.

---

Shikamaru yawned, "Why are we here again?"

Sasuke glared at the lazy genius, "To get my house back."

Kiba snickered a little again, still _infinitely_ amused that the girls had kicked him out of his own house… '_Now so great now, are you Uchiha?_'

Sasuke glared at him, "Shut it. We need a plan…"

"And why do _we_ need to help you?" Inari asked, pointing to Konomaharu, Udon and himself, they had been playing video-games when the Uchiha presented his 'crisis'.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes darkly at them, "Firstly, because I am bigger and stronger than you. Secondly, this is a matter of pride. If they're doing this now it's only a matter of time before they kick one of _you_ out of _your_ homes."

There was a grumble of agreement among the males, all of them hoped to nip this in the bud.

"But how?" Naruto's question caused an uneasy silence.

Haku shrugged off-handedly, "I could go in under-cover."

Sasuke groaned, "They know your face idiot, that's not going to work."

Haku shook his head and smiled, "No, I don't mean like that. They already practically consider me 'one of the girls' they probably wouldn't mind me dropping by."

The Uchiha shook his head, "That wont work."

He blinked, "Why not?"

"_Tayuya's_ there." A shudder went through most of the males present at the name.

"Oh." It was a well known fact that though Tayuya wasn't nice to many, she _particularly_ detested the effeminate male known as Momichi Haku.

"Intruder!" Sasuke jumped out of his skin at Udon's alarmed cry. All of them looked to where he was directing his attention…

A girl with indigo hair and pale eyes looked nervously back at them from where she was attempting to hide behind a tree.

A smirk graced Sasuke's face, "Look's like we have our first hostage."

"Eh?!" Hinata's cry of alarm was heeded by none.

---

"Hinata's taking awful long to go bathroom…" Hana trailed off, a worried expression coming to her.

Ino shrugged "She probably just got lost or something. I mean what else could happen to her? Getting kidnapped by a vengeance driven Sasuke-kun?" laughter went through the girls before it dried up into nervous chuckles.

"S-Sasuke-kun wouldn't…" Sakura began before Karin's skeptical look reached her, "Oh crap… he _so_ would."

* * *

((Ending Notes: You know… this is my first ever three-shot… I'm having so much fun writing it X3 lol, read, review, whatever! I'm still considering pairings by the way, of course there will be some SasuHina('cause I'm addicted), probably some HakuTayu(it's cute… you know it is) but I find myself at a loss with the others.

I like SuiKar(is that how it looks?) so I might put that in… but I also like SaiKar… and I like _way_ too many Ino pairings… . I'm thinking on some KibaIno… but then NejiIno bites me in the ass… and _NaruIno_ calls for me. Not to mention the ever classic ShikaIno… and Sakura-chan! NaruSaku, KibaSaku, ShikaSaku, LeeSaku, NejiSaku, ItaSaku, ChouSaku… you name it as long as it's not Sasu-baka. I'm probably going with ChouKin because… I like it XD but ChouIno…

Currently I'm ignoring all my fav Hina pairings because… I pretty much love her with anyone but incest and Naruto… don't know why I don't like NaruHina, I just never warmed up to it, KibaHina was cuter.

I'm clueless with what I want to do with Gaara-kun… help? Hm… oh! GaaHanabi? XD I love that one… almost as much as KibaHanabi and KonoHanabi…

And then ShikaTema, LeeTema, TemaTen, SasuTema and TemaSaku all bite me in the ass, begging for a cameo.

I'm pretty stuck with ItaHana though, it's so cute X3 I really should post the fanart I have for it… and I mean Inuzuka Hana, not Hanabi-chan… not that _that_ ItaHana isn't also cute…

I'm thinking about InarMoe, I've always had a soft spot for that pairing…

OMG, I just thought about what all the poor canon readers must be doing… writhing on the ground in pain maybe? X3 lol. I like canon! I love NaruSaku(which is very canon, thank you very much)! And lotsa other canon goodness… I just also like lotsa cracky goodness XD XD XD.

Okay, I am done with my endless babble… geez, here I am going on and on about couplings and I don't plan for there to be much romance in this fic -.-' lol.

Muse-chan off to eat Mac an' Cheese!!))


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